How To Counterbalance The Effects Of Loneliness

Loneliness is not always about being without other people around you; it is the perception of being alone or isolated and the feelings of sadness that accompany this situation.
For many, these feelings are caused by not having found a partner, and for others it is difficult to create new relationships, or even maintain ties of any kind. And the truth is, loneliness can be distressing…

Consequences of Loneliness

Recent studies have shown that loneliness can have repercussions not only on your mood, but also on your physical health.  People who feel empty, lonely and unwanted are more likely to suffer from cardiovascular disease, increased levels of stress, decreased memory and reduced learning ability. Feelings of loneliness can even lead to depression and suicide.

What can you do if you feel lonely?

The solution is not to get into a relationship heedlessly without caring who, with the intention of feeling accompanied. Although this is a very common strategy for those who suffer from loneliness, the truth is that, definitely, more than solving the problem, it brings more serious complications and generates conflicts. Anyway, this medicine is worse than the disease. The key is to learn both the art of being alone and the art of being together.

Do you suffer from loneliness or enjoy it?

If your personal circumstances have changed recently, whether it’s due to the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or simply the change of a friend, and now you find yourself alone, think that you can take advantage of the new situation to take a positive experience. .

the art of being alone

Use this phase to get to know yourself better. When you’re around someone else, you always have to make commitments, and if your partner had a more dominant personality than you, you might end up giving in most of the time. Enjoy the moments of meeting yourself. 

Reaffirm your identity.  It can be very helpful to “freshen up” some things like: What are the foods you like? How do you want to decorate the place? What programs do you like to watch? It sounds very simple, but  many times you will find that your tastes have changed or that you were depriving yourself of some things.

Become self-sufficient. This is an opportunity to acquire new skills and knowledge. Learn to stick to a budget or fix your faucet leak. Find the time that works best for you. Knowing that you can take care of yourself and that you can do it well will give you an incomparable sense of satisfaction.

Take some time for yourself.  Remember that if you have just ended a romantic relationship, you will need time to heal emotionally, and it would not be wise for you to start another relationship right away. Space will allow you to think about what is really important to you, what you should look for in your future partner, and what you want to improve on yourself.

Anyway, it’s a time to grow and mature. If you don’t know how to be happy alone, you won’t know how to be happy in a relationship.  Nobody can use a “magic wand” to dissolve their internal dilemmas.

The art of being accompanied

After having experienced the art of being alone, it is necessary to experience the art of being accompanied. An important first step is to establish good relationships with your family members. Try to make peace with any distant family members. This is good practice and a “proof” for yourself. Even if you can’t make the relationship perfect, at least you’ll be doing your part to open up the avenues of communication. If your goal is to maintain a stable emotional relationship, your partner will be your closest family.

Strengthen your friendships. If social situations are difficult for you to handle and you tend to avoid them, set a goal to do something with friends at least once a week. Try not to go into isolation.  You can broaden your circle of friends by joining a readership club, going to the gym, or taking classes on a topic that interests you. Knowing how to have good friends is essential in order to have a successful romantic relationship. After all, marriage is the union of two friends, right?

Finally, remember that feelings of loneliness do not arise from being alone, but rather from how you perceive the situation.  The serious thing is that its consequences can be devastating, both emotionally and physically.

So don’t suffer from loneliness; learn from it and enjoy it. Set a goal to learn both arts: being alone and being together.