Does A New Love Heal A Broken Heart?
When we go through a breakup of a love relationship, the pain and suffering we feel can be very intense. These sensations can even lead us to think that the end of the relationship is an unbearable situation, for which we need an effective and quick solution. Some people choose to seek new love and start a new relationship to heal their broken heart and try to get rid of the discomfort they feel.
Is starting a relationship immediately after a breakup the best option? Does a new love heal a broken heart? Will letting someone else into our lives be the cure for all ills? Due to the unintended consequences this situation may have, we cannot generalize the answer. However, this is an option that should be considered very carefully. Let’s see below.
The endings of relationships
The end of a romantic relationship is something very common. In fact, they occur daily for many different reasons. Jealousy, end of love, insecurities, distrust, different ways of life, different ways of thinking, lack of tolerance in the couple… There are a multitude of reasons that can lead to the end of a relationship.
Society changes over time, and it has certainly changed a lot in recent decades. With that, the types of relationships also changed. Nowadays it’s not strange to find people who change boyfriends all the time. In many cases, they do it without stopping to think and understand what might be happening to them.
Although, luckily, not many people are jumping from relationship to relationship, we can observe that this speed at which changes occur, including in the field of relationships, is something very characteristic of our time. Perhaps this is why they created this popular belief that a new love heals a broken heart.
Now, having to face everything that breaking up a relationship entails is difficult. It can be terrible, but unfortunately it is necessary. In the end, it is a grieving process and that involves taking it one step at a time, with different phases or steps that we have to go through in order to regain emotional balance.
What happens when a relationship ends?
Anguish? Fear? Loneliness? All of these emotions and many more appear disorganized when we go through a breakup. What happens is that such a break necessarily causes changes in our lives. We need to deal with the uncertainty that arises and the pain that a broken heart causes. Things won’t be the same as before… The daily routine will be different and will be impregnated with memories of the other person, which will make it obligatory to face their absence in our new reality.
When we end a relationship, we lose the place we previously occupied in the other person’s life. There is a part of our identity that is lost with this termination, while within us a new emptiness appears, with which we don’t know what to do. The pain of a broken heart drives us to act without thinking.
For this reason, many of us end up choosing to start a new relationship or even an adventure in an attempt to do something with this deep sense of emptiness. This is a way of facing reality that can bring about a lessening of the pain of the breakup and a distraction from the memories that insist on appearing, whether they are beautiful or painful.
Can the pain of termination lessen if we ignore it with a new love?
Starting a relationship shortly after a breakup can be a pain reliever for the pain we are feeling. Not necessarily, however, the strategy will work as a cure for a broken heart. Let’s imagine that the breakup in love is like breaking a leg. If we take a pain reliever we will feel less pain, but we will not be treating the real problem.
When we decide to be with other people but don’t wait the necessary time to assimilate what happened, we can take many aspects and difficulties from the old relationship to the new one. We can see defects where they don’t exist. On the contrary, if we go through the entire grieving process correctly, we can review the whole role that relationship played in our lives, what we can learn, and release the feelings that got stuck with the loss to start a new relationship in the best way. healthy as possible.
An example of taking problems from the old relationship to the new is the comparisons we may end up making between our previous love and the person we are meeting. We can also be afraid that history will repeat itself, taking with us distrust and jealousy. All of this will be a consequence of not waiting the time necessary to really heal, to feel safe again and to be able to surrender again.
If we don’t take time between the two relationships, sadness and hurt will quickly begin to appear, as we will inevitably have memories of the old relationship. We can get angry and repeat patterns of what went wrong in the previous relationship. In short, we will begin to live the grieving process that was not lived, but being with someone else. This, far from favoring the new relationship, can turn it into a toxic or addictive bond.
The end of a relationship causes a grieving process that must be respected. Overcoming the end does not mean forgetting the ex, but remembering without pain. Only then can we start a new relationship in a healthy way, without it causing a despair to be with someone in order to escape the emptiness and the feeling of loss.
In practice, a broken heart is unlikely to be cured with a new relationship. More likely, only time and self-rebuilding can cure you. One person will never make you surpass another. We need to understand the loss and the emotions derived from it. Only then will we be ready to let a new person into our lives.
