9 Habits To Keep Love

Ana is no longer happy with him. Everything she fell in love with seems to have disappeared like a puff of smoke. She sits alone, carelessly… he no longer texts her when he’s working saying “I’m thinking of you…” nor does he kiss her when he gets home… And she wonders, what happened to our love? Do we still have a solution?

Ana stopped trusting him and feels that there is no longer anything to unite them. There are no more kisses or caresses, they just talk… they don’t even tell about their day. Those little daily things that united them so much and that made Ana feel special are over. The routine, the time and, perhaps, the thought that everything is already won, that everything is already achieved, is ruining her relationship with Pedro.

Pedro does not feel happy either… when he returns from work, he feels as alone as she does. Pedro and Ana have different work schedules and, often, Pedro has lunch or dinner without the company of that knowing smile and so beautiful of hers, which he remembers while eating the last portion before going to sleep. Also alone… because Ana works the night shift.

This fictional story just related could reflect one of the many stories of couples who are not experiencing the best of times in their relationship. But in situations like this, the only thing we can do is say that it’s all over ? Is there still a solution for us?

Love is the greatest of the mysteries and the best of the adventures that each one of us lives, in a unique and special way. In love, there are no recipes or magic formulas, neither for it to appear nor for its maintenance… but perhaps love is like a small plant that we must water every day, or like a flame that sometimes burns with force and at other times it is weak and small, but it never goes out.

It is known that magic formulas do not exist in love, but perhaps emotional intelligence applied to love can help us. For this reason, we want to present an interesting article, published in “Psycology Today” by psychiatrist and consultant Mark Goulston. This writer is also the author of the book “How to get and keep the love you deserve”, which shows us 9 habits that characterize happy couples. Maybe it’s not magic, but emotional intelligence…

This is the interesting list of 9 habits that happy couples have, according to Dr. Goulston:

1. Have common interests. Doing things together brings people together. And doing things separately can be appropriate for our partner to find us more interesting. Furthermore, it avoids dependence on others.

2. Trust each other and forgive each other. Holding resentment and not forgiving paralyzes relationships. After so much fighting, when the waters calm down, talking, forgiving and trusting again is the best we can do with our partner.

3. They walk together, side by side, hand in hand. Walking together is a way of feeling that you have a common destiny, of synchronizing your steps every now and then.

4. Go to bed at the same time. At the beginning of relationships, couples usually go to bed at the same time, to strengthen the bond they have. However, when the couple has been together for a long time, each one chooses their hours. This only makes the desire go away, as intimate contact – physical and mental – in bed is very important.

5. Say “Good morning” and “I love you” when starting the day. What better way to start the day and face the routine and stress of work and daily worries?

6. Say “Good night” before bed, even though they are upset. It’s a way to make our partner understand that, even though this isn’t the best day between you, there is still love.

7. Call and text each other during the day. It’s a good way to maintain empathy with our partner. Knowing how your day is going is good for knowing how to act when it comes back.

8. They are proud to show themselves in public as a couple. They walk hand in hand, touch each other at the waist and shoulder, what matters is that they want to make their love public, that they feel proud to be with each other.

9. Focus on the positive aspects of your partner. We all have negative and positive things. So, it is always better to focus on the positive aspects of our partner. The negative only adds more negativity.

What would you add to the list? If both members of the relationship love each other, there is almost always a solution.