Is It Really Necessary To Have A Pair?
Having a loving relationship that is based on respect offers many satisfactions, produces great well-being, and can be of great support. Personal development is mutual and both acquire a unique and wonderful learning experience.
What happens if someone doesn’t have a partner or doesn’t want to have one?
This is a very personal matter, as many people have other priorities in life besides having a date, which is very respectable. For these people, having a pair may not even match the lifestyle they want to live, so they decide not to have it.
Having a pair is a choice, it is not necessary as it depends on what each person wants in their life. One can live perfectly without a partner, as our value as a person and personal satisfaction do not depend on whether we have a partner or not.
The loving relationships we have also say a lot about ourselves, our insecurities, vulnerabilities and fears.
Often, we seem to repeat the same peer profile more than once, even if it ends up causing dissatisfaction. This doesn’t happen by chance, it has a lot to do with what we still need to learn to maintain a healthy relationship.
What does a healthy love relationship consist of?
We often relate to people who, far from making us feel happy because we are with them, end up filling us with bitterness and dissatisfaction.
The experience of living love in a relationship is a path of mutual maturation, in which we learn many things about ourselves exchanging tastes, passions and pleasures with our partner. We also share difficulties, fears and needs that do not correspond to our inner opening. Thus, we show the most intimate aspects that do not usually come to light.
A couple relationship is no longer healthy the moment it becomes a need, an emotional dependence that places our value on the other person. This way of creating bonds can be very harmful.
With or without a partner, the most important thing is to like yourself first, value yourself and respect yourself. In this way, whether we want to have a partner or not, we will be able to affectively bond with others in a satisfactory way, which are the basic pillars to maintain a healthy relationship.
In spite of everything, the objective to maintain affective bonds with other people is to feel good. However, it is essential to distinguish between the need to obtain this well-being through someone or to share it.
A healthy relationship presupposes acceptance to share what we are with the other person in a common space, which also allows us the right to enjoy our own space.
Why does society have the thought that it is necessary to have a partner?
The most common thing in the society we live in is having a partner, or at least that’s what society makes us believe and we always see through the media, literature and our education.
Surely you remember more than one family member asking, “What about boyfriends?” since childhood… Looking for a pair can end up being a burden in life, as some do it out of obligation, feeling bad for not having one.
This idea was also introduced through films and short stories, in which great importance is given to romantic love, to princes and princesses, to the existence of the half of the orange and to the significant fact that one has to suffer for love. All these myths echo in our minds as: “You have to have a partner to be happy.”
Marriages and the couple have consolidated in our culture as a fundamental nucleus in the organization of our communities. However, there are many people who decide not to have a partner, it can be for a certain time or it can even be for their whole life.
The important point on this subject is knowing that having a partner is part of a choice, not a necessity. When it appears as a necessity, dependence, conformism and the feeling of ownership appear, in such a way that we build a relationship based on despair.
